The world is ever changing. It is something I already learned from Wald Disney movies when I was 5 years old. How well for example The Lion King explains the cycle of life. But even though it is obvious that the life is constantly moving and changing, there are such funny beliefs in our society about holding on things. I could even describe it as an attachment society. Since childhood we are taught to hold on in life: if there is something good that you finally reach, don’t let it go! Save up money, buy a house and collect all these items that you might need some day. Save up for old days. Don’t throw it away as it is full of precious memories! We are brought up to prepare for bad days. It is noteworthy that our parents actually went through difficult times and they could only teach us what they knew at the time but how much of all these beliefs are created by a fear of not being able to survive? I think that by expecting and preparing for the bad days you simply invite them to come.
Holding on to items and material is referred to our physical health as well as mental, emotional and energetic wellbeing. We become emotionally attached to material around us hence depended also on an environment we live. Subconscious is afraid of letting go and there is a fear of not surviving without. Ego or rational mind thinks that if it let’s go of something important it will lack something important. But the fact is that you have to let go of old in order to make room for new. It is a simple law of the universe. It is how nature works. It is even how the human body works through the take in, assimilation and elimination (also known as pooping).
My parents divorced when I was 5 years old. Since then I was moving every week between my parents households until I moved away from home when I was 18. My parents did exactly the right decision and everyday I am grateful that I had them both in my life throughout the childhood. Nevertheless, moving around for years was very stressful for a child. I became attached to my items and clothes. I was thinking “maybe I will need this next week” and packed it with me. There were bags and bags of stuff that both my sister and I wanted to take with us every week. A little child felt unstable and was looking for stability from material around. When I moved away from home, I was still thinking the same way: I did not want to throw things away as I might need them some day.
I have been living 1,5 years out of my backpack now and it has been the greatest lesson of letting go and releasing. What a simple wisdom it is to say that less is actually more. I let go of my home that I absolutely loved. I let go of all the daily items I have had through my lifetime building security around me. Ever since I released the protection wall built by material around me I felt more secure and safe than ever before. I am technically homeless person but I have not felt like one even a day. I only have few sets of clothes that I am wearing so I also had to let go of concerns about my look and style. Ironically, I have never felt this beautiful in my life before and I have never received as many compliments from others as well. I let go of outer surface to allow some room for my inner beauty to glow. Sounds cheesy but that’s how I actually feel.
Being attached is not only material issue but also mental and emotional. It is such a broad phenomenon that I will refer to it many times on my blog posts. It is obvious that all the lived experiences have shaped you to be as you are today. They all had an important meaning when they were a topical issue in your life and none of them was worthless. But even though every single turn and twist has had value in your life, it does not mean that you are required to hold on to these experiences and memories. Remember, they are past now and you are allowed to let them go.
Many times it feels that the easiest way to move on in life is just to forget the old, press it down and not come back to it anymore. Unfortunately, ignoring the experience does not remove it from your body’s warehouse – it just buries is deeper. In order to let go of past it is necessary to face, accept and forgive it. If this is not done consciously, it will remain as an unconscious memory in body and mind influencing a daily life. Old painful memories are causing so much fear and pain in the body that it can concentrate a physical symptoms such cancers, lupus, etc. Like Louise Hay, I also believe that all the diseases are created by ourselves. Definitely not by purpose but for example by being attached to painful memories that we might not even be conscious of anymore. It is not a coincidence that the most of the breast cancer patients have had problems with either receiving or giving love, being over protective or not feeling worthy enough.
I noticed that by letting go of physical environment and items it made it a lot easier to release also old beliefs that had been some sort of truths for me until then. Beliefs about fitting in the box so that I am normal and accepted by others. Beliefs such completing master’s degree is the best path to success or it is necessary to have a stable career and be prepared to anything that life brings, just in case. Or material like own house and car brings happiness and getting married and having children is the goal of all the normal 30 years olds. With no doubt, these are beautiful guidelines for some but there is a countless amount of other ways for abundance, success and happiness as well.
Being unconsciously and excessively attached followed me also in my first romantic relationships. I was extremely fond of my partners and draped myself to their lives. I wanted to share all my time and everything around me with them. Fare enough, after a while my inner self felt choked and every time I found myself looking for more space for myself. I escaped many times and it was almost always me who left. This cycle continued to a day that I learned about unconditional love, which is another story.
Thus, one of the most complex forms of attachment is occurring with relationships. Millions of people spend their lives in relationships where attachment is thought to be normal. For example jealousy or not being able to trust are two of the most common symptoms of being too attached. Many women for example even feel good if a partner is jealous! When I first moved away from the country I let go of people that I love the most including my family, friends and significant other. Completely new world opened to me. After suffering and being miserable for a while I understood that letting go of love actually brought a lot more love in my life. Not having loved ones around me all the time I had so much love in my hands that I needed to share. And so I did. Suddenly I had so many moms, dads, sisters, brothers and soul mates all around the world. I learned to love strangers as I love my family. I learned to love my friends as I love my partner. For the first time, I truly experienced unconditional love – to give and receive love, no matter what. The love was not bound only to few people anymore – I saw it everywhere. I became fearless and trusted on the world around me. I told to my family not to be worried as the universe would catch me if I fell. And so it did, every single time.
It is not easy to let go of material and even less easy to release people, experiences and memories from your life. It might be scary and asks truly a lot of courage. Letting go measures how rich and comprehensive your life actually is, without all the things that you are holding on to. Of course, there is a great amount of things that are serving you maybe the rest of the life but there is always something that needs to be cleaned up in order to develop and make room for new. Here are few easy ways to release yourself of unnecessary attachments:
Clean your home and give away: Like Louise Hay says, by cleaning your own house you also clean your mental house. As dull as it sounds like, take time to go through everything in your house and give away all the material that are not serving you anymore. Challenge yourself by giving away for example your favorite piece of clothing to someone. When you do this, say to yourself I let go of everything that is not serving me anymore. You’ll get over it, you made someone very happy and you cleaned your mental house.
Clean your mind: As humans we have a great power to teach ourselves to do anything. So go ahead and clean your thoughts instead of letting the thoughts dictate your beliefs and behavior. Everyday when you pull something off of or clean something such brushing your hair, ripping paper, doing dishes or laundry, say to yourself I am willing to let go of (old belief/person/experience) and I clean it off as it is not serving me anymore.
Accept, forgive and let go: If there is a hunting experience or memory in your past, face it today. For example, go back to your ex- relationship and accept all the details in it. As painful it is, forgive every single bit of it to your ex-partner regardless what happened and forgive yourself. Then let the experience go. Now you are free.
Be a blue sky: To help the process of letting go, you can imagine that you are a clear blue sky. What ever it is that you need to let go of, thought, emotion, people, items, life situation imagine it as a cloud. Let the cloud come in front of you and accept its presence. But when the wind blows stronger, let the cloud move on and pass you. Let it go and release it with love. Make room for new. Don’t restrict the change that is happening regardless. If it is pain, let it be, accept it with love, find out what it is that you need to learn from it, then forgive it and let it go. If it is joyful and happy event, enjoy it when it is before you, be grateful of it as carefully as you can and then let it go. Letting go sets you free.
The world is ever changing. The life is a river that constantly flows on. Jump into this river with courage and trust. Let it clean you and fill up with sparkling life force. Can you feel how powerful it is? Surrender and see where it takes you. Give space for your spirit to grow and expand.